Volume 2 Issue 3
"Living In Paradise"
"What’s it like living Paradise?" Some might ask. It reminds me of Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Except there are no Umpa
Lumpas (although I have seen a few really short people), no crazy eccentric candy man, and no land make of chocolate and candies. So I guess it’s
not like it at all.
If I call one of you and start taking about a convoy and when it’s leaving and where it’s going don’t start freaking out. Supposedly all
communication are monitored by a few different foreign intelligent agencies and I just like to mess with them every once in a while. Make sure
they’re paying attention and keep them on their toes. In actuality I know squat about convoys or when or where they’re going.
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Living Arrangements
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Right now I live in the barracks while waiting for a container. The barracks is basically just a regular two story building that they put up some
sheet rock walls to make smaller rooms out of. People waiting for permanent housing and people in transit (either for R&R or to another base)
are the only people who live there. It’s not too bad, but would really suck to live there for long periods of time. I somehow managed to get my
own room. The rooms have either one or two sets of bunk beds and a cabinet or two with four shelves on each side. Some people took the top shelf
our and put a bar in so that they can hang their clothes up. My room is about 5 by 10, so I’m not lying when I say I live in a closet. All the
rooms have a window unit A/C, but I don’t turn mine on. I’m trying to get acclimated to the heat and with other people A/Cs on it’s not too bad.
I decided to sleep on the bottom bunk just in case anything fell from the ceiling at least the top mattress
would slow it down if not stop it. For permanent living there are portable buildings, not unlike the T-sacks outside ofSpring Woods. Here at the
CPA they are split in half and house two people sharing a bathroom in the middle. In the container there are also TVs with DVD player, a night
stand, wardrobe, and beds. At other camps they’re divided into three sections with 2 people in each room and a community bathroom somewhere.
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Where’s The Beef
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I’ve had a lot of people ask how the food is around here. It’s about the same variety as dorm food. It’s not what I’d classify as good by any
means, but it’s not that bad. Most the meals are pretty Americanized and nothing too exotic. The only thing they haven’t figured out is bread.
There are four kinds of bread: sandwich bread, buns, corn bread and dinner rolls. That may sound like a lot but dinner rolls cover a very broad
category. For instance if they want to make a Danish they flatten out a roll and put some jelly on it and poof instant Danish. Croissants are just
dinner rolls that were twisted before they are baked. Biscuits are just dinner rolls served for breakfast with the intention of putting sausage
cream gravy over then. I just can’t understand a kitchen that can make some awesome corn bread, but doesn’t know how to make biscuits. If you
can’t make something then just admit it and move on, don’t try to replace it with something it’s not. There are a few different places we can eat
around here. There’s the KBR DFac by where we live, the Palace next door to where we live, D2 (never been there), and the Green Zone Café (never
been there either, but heard it’s more of the same). Over at BIAP (Baghdad International Airport) the have a Burger King, but it’s not like I can
go there just for a meal since you have to pass through a small red zone to get there. They’ve put a portable building with a Pizza Inn over by the
Rec center, but it’s been here since before I got here and doesn’t look like it’s opening anytime soon. It would be nice to get a little variety
and get some real pizza instead of the stuff they consider pizza here.
